It was 1971 when I sat in my bedroom and pondered what I could make with some extra dark green velvet fabric. The material was left over from a prom dress I made. I had enough material for hot pants, proudly wore the hottest style to Junior High School. There was a school-wide assembly that day and I was a scheduled speaker on stage that day. The Vice President saw me walking in the hallway and brought me in to her office. Although there wasn’t any dress code on the wearing of hot pants, she systematically scolded me on my attire. She made me feel like a criminal. I was hurt, angry and frustrated on the school’s vague dress code policy and especially from her pulling me right before my speech. She was planning to send me home to change (a long walk home). Fortunately, I saw a friend in the office and told her what had happened. We didn’t have cell phones back them, but word got around fast that I needed a pair of pants. Before you knew it, a pair showed up (someone had a pair in their locker). I was able to stand on that stage in front of everyone and gave my speech, and passionately expressing my feelings about the dress code policy to which there was thunderous clapping in agreement.
Back in the day, I confess I wore miniskirts, short dresses, halter tops, maxi skirts, bell bottoms, jeans, and bikinis. I was a teenager and like all teenagers I was into the fashion of the day. My mother, a single parent, allowed me the freedom to wear whatever I wanted and so I did. I went along with the fads and the changing clothing culture. I was a church attender at the time and not very knowledgeable about the Bible. I was unaware of what God’s standards were for godly women.
What Does the Bible Say?
“…. also, that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.” 1 Timothy 2:8-10
“Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.” 1 Peter 3:3-4
Both Paul and Peter are writing here. They are not saying women cannot braid their hair, wear gold and pearls, etc. Women can certainly adorn themselves and look beautiful wearing clothing.
What Exactly is Modesty?
First, what does “modesty” mean? Webster’s definition of modesty, propriety in dress, speech, or conduct”. Dictionary.com describes it as “freedom from vanity”.
Grandma in a Bikini
I think we can all agree that a bikini shows pretty much all the goods you have as there is little imagination to the beholder. The bikini bares all and is still the mainstay on the beaches and pools these days. I became a grandmother at the young age of 43 and had a slim and trim body at the time. My husband encouraged me to buy a particular bikini while visiting a surf shop in California. After the trip, I can tell you it was an uncomfortable feeling showing beach photos to the entire family. The grandkids don’t want to remember grandma wearing a bikini. So, no more bikinis. I don’t need to get a tan, the sun has given me skin cancer (the killer kind, melanoma). I would agree one-piece swimsuits still shows some skin; but they are more comfortable, appropriate, and show respect for myself and others. With skin cancer on the rise, more companies are offering even better coverage options with UV protection in swimwear. Just Google “UV swimwear” or “modest swimwear”. Modesty can also protect your skin.
Examine Your Motives
If you are wearing skimpy and sexy clothing, you need to figure out the motive? Are you needing approval from others? Are you trying to fit into the latest trend? When you wear revealing clothing, you are sending a message about who you are. Did you know that people make an impression of you in their first 7 seconds of meeting you? Studies say the main criteria is appearance. The clothing you wear conveys to the world who you are inside. It all boils down to …. what condition is your heart?
Affecting Others
What we wear can be a sexual temptation to others. We need to be aware of how our outward appearance can affect the opposite sex. Wear clothing that is honoring to the eyes of others, it shows you care about the spiritual state of our brothers and sisters in Christ. Women who dress provocatively may end up tempting their Christian brothers to sin and may end up in sexual sin themselves. The issue of modesty is something to consider in helping others avoid temptation.
“Things that cause people to stumble are bound to come, but woe to anyone through whom they come.” Luke 17:1
Consider that those whose hearts are inclined toward self will dress in a manner designed to draw attention to themselves with little or no regard for the consequences to themselves or others.
Media Doesn’t Help
Today we are flooded with sexual images: from television, movies, the internet, Super Bowl halftime shows and award shows. In our household, we often must change the channel so great grandma (who lives with us) and our grandkids (who visit) don’t have to see it. Who can forget the 2020 Super Bowl halftime show featuring Jennifer Lopez and Shakira’s wearing scantily clad, dancing in sexually suggestive ways around a stripper pole? Millions of people it watched that day, and many parents had to change the channel or send their kids out of the room.
Styles Will Always Change
Long ago I went to college to get a degree in Fashion Design & Merchandising. One thing I learned is that the fashion industry dictates fashion and beauty, and they will drive new trends which are constantly changing. Keeping up is difficult and often those same fashion trends will circle back around again. I should have kept my bell bottoms.
What Should We Wear?
There isn’t a dress code in the Bible. There is no list in the Bible of what you should wear. Although some of the outfits people post on social media are incredulous, especially if they are a Christ follower. It’s easy to judge others, but who am I to judge? So I just scroll right past those images. Christian woman’s inner character will guide her clothing choices. As you mature in Christ and understand that God sees you as beautiful, you will know how what to wear.
For me as I grew more mature in Christ, I was a bit slow in being cognizant of my clothing. But after accessing my closet, I began giving away clothes through the years. Some pieces I kept, placing safety pins where the neckline was simply too low or modifying them. Now, I’m intentionally purchasing clothing with normal necklines, lower dress lengths, longer shorts and wearing layers. My scarf collection is out of control, and I love to wear them in the fall. Because I’m a seamstress, I am fortunate that I can always design and sew clothes.
Fashion for 2021 is bra tops, hot pants, miniskirts, and more of those see-through mesh dresses. Lord have mercy. You won’t see me wearing these.
The Main Point
The main point of Biblical modesty is the “attitude of the heart”. If a woman’s heart is inclined toward godliness, she will wear clothing that steers away from being provocative. Regardless of how your co-workers, friends or favorite singer or Hollywood star may be dressing, resist the temptation to go along with the crowd. There are gorgeous fabrics and striking styles that look attractive and elegant.
Lastly, as a Christian your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Remember that your body has value and worth.
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So, glorify God in your body. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Author: Sharon E. Miller